Adoption

Where to begin....I've always wanted a big family. Brian and I have always talked about children and when we got married we already had a beautiful girl. So, after marriage it was only fitting to add another which happened to be a boy and a "clone" of his father. I think for Brian that was a big family lol...a boy and a girl and he was good. Well, once they are up and walking I am ready for another. I'm being honest in saying I'm not a fan of the infant stage. Brian and I always joked that if I could carry them inside till they were toddlers I would. When Corbin was one I requested information about adoption. I got the paperwork and dvd etc...Brian wasn't quite ready then. I prayed and left the subject of adoption alone. Not long after we were pregnant with William. After c-section #3 I am DONE! William began to walk and the nest had a place I wanted to fill through adoption. I began to talk to Brian about it, not quite ready yet. We have some dear friends that began their adoption of a special needs boy from China. I was completely intrigued and had a million questions for them. I harrased questioned them extensively. They even went over their dossier guide with me and the entire process they explained. Thank you thank you thank you...
Once again we are discussing adoption and agree to pray about it. Brian somewhat agrees to begin the process of adoption through CCAI of a special needs child. On the last day of our homestudy we get "THE" call that night. "Melissa, would you like to review the file of a baby boy"??? duh....Of course WE would love to. We saw Wen's face and read his file. I was crying and Brian was quiet. I began to worry a little that night. We talked some about moving forward with accepting his file and submitting our LOI. I still had concern about Daddy's feelings about him. His file stated that he had cleft lip/palate and hearing loss in one ear. The next day I am ready to compile our LOI at the same time I wasn't really certain Brian had the same excitement and instant love that I did. I was WRONG!!! Brian called me from work and I was asking him what to write as far as medical treatment etc...when out of his mouth came "I don't really care if he can't hear out of one ear or if  it's temporary or what else may be wrong, he is MY SON". That's all I needed to allow myself to fall completely in love with this little man that we have named Samuel WenHao Smith. Brian had finally wrapped his mind around bringing home this little man and him being OURS!!!
The paperwork frenzy was crazy and in full swing when a little girl's file popped up on CCAI's site and I was more than interested. Now, the idea of adoption and bringing home a baby boy was already a lot for Brian and me at times. Especially at five in the evenings when I'm cooking, have one diving off the couch onto the ottoman, one asking 8 thousand times when is daddy getting home and one that still hasn't finished her schoolwork. But, nonetheless, Miss Adaline was out there with no mom or dad. I requested her file and texted Brian about her. We get tons several adoption emails per day. My text said have you looked at the little girls file in our email. He pulled it up and said "oh she is cute". Since we communicate so well, he didn't quite get that the email was her entire file and it didn't just pop up on our email randomly. This mama was asking if we could adopt her too. I left the subject alone for a little while knowing we had a short amount of time to decide before her file would be given to another agency. He quickly realized I was serious and he read her file. He said let me pray about it and think about it. The following Sunday afternoon after church he said I can't come up with a reason NOT to adopt her. Any reason we may have would be selfish. Let's do it! Yipppeeee that's all I needed to hear. Where will they sleep, how will we handle five kids, not enough room for three carseats and a booster seat, seven people at the table without inviting guests, doctor's appointments....God will provide!!! He will give us the answers to all these questions and take care of our family. I get very mixed opinions and comments from family and friends about our decision to adopt. My question is "why not"??? No one has given me an answer that is not selfish or worldly. My three bio kids will not suffer or do without because we made the decision to adopt two more children. They are so excited and can't wait to travel to China. I pray ALL of our children will grow to love all people and not see skin color or special needs. I truly believe God will bless our home and work out every detail as we face it. I have complete trust and faith in my God!!! Thank you for allowing me to be the mother of this wild bunch of Smith kiddos.

Update 6/30/16
                                                                            

 

 

About a year ago we started talking about adoption again. The teen harassed/begged us daily for a new baby brother. We viewed MANY videos and files of babies needing a family. One day in September Beckett's file was on a Facebook advocacy site. That was all it took for me....not much more to convince Daddy he was ours. On 7/03/16 I will hold him in my arms!!! Praying for him today. His little world is about to be torn apart. The beauty/tragedy of adoption is HUGE. It will be messy for a while until he accepts that we will love him forever.